Freestyle Haiku

I thought this deserved its own post.

I know everyone sort of expected it. Every time you tuned in, you thought to yourself, "one day, that goofy bastard's gonna get it..." But at the same time, it was what he did... If anyone could juggle some scorpions while jerking off a croc with his left foot, it was steve... (ok, i dont think that ever happend., i'm just trying to make a point here. he did some pretty crazy stuff, even if that didnt exactly include juggling some scorpions while jerking off a croc with his left foot.)

The crocodile hunter met his end doing something he loved, in a way that was completely fitting. And even though he didnt want to die, that might very well be the way he would have wanted to go. Death by stingray.

None the less, i was surprisingly sad when i heard this news. i cant explain it, but i sat up in bed last night at 3am when i heard the news and thought, "what the fuck? Cmon... not the god-damned crocodile hunter!"

(you need to put that in a sad, depressed tone... not an angry one)

i'm not sure why it made me sad... but it did. and i'm not entirely sure why, but i'll miss him. i didnt watch his show very often, but he was entertaining. and he seemed like a nice guy too... at least i'm gonna assume he was a nice guy.

And so now, we, the unclean masses, are left to brave this cruel world, without the knowledge that somewhere out there, theres a crazy bastard with a think australian accent attempting to circumcize a hippo, and we'll get to watch it all next week.

all sarcasm aside, that makes my heart just a little bit heavier.

so long crocdile hunter. godspeed.

Posted by Nickel at 12:05 AM | Permalink | Comments

You're not done yet?

I'm not gonna lie to you, it isnt the first time ive felt the bitter sting of those harsh four words. In the past, i've replied with a number of well calculated retorts, ranging from "i just need five more minutes", to "i'll catch up with you later", to "maybe i'm just not that attracted to you". On a clever day, when a question makes me wince, i'll throw out a comeback that will hopefully make the question-asker wince back, or at least think about asking such a dumb question the next time... obviously i'm not done, or you wouldnt have to ask.

In the case of my deck, i dont really blame anyone for asking, its just getting tiresome. While i'm sure there are many sarcastic or clever answers to the question, i've decided to stick with the ol' tried and true, "nope".

I'm thinking from now on, i'm just going to tell people i'm building a helicopter landing pad. I couldnt find any definitive dimensions off google, but 28'x25' is definitely big enough to land a small helicopter on...

i dont have great photo-documentation of the progress, but i do have a few photos:

This was the only photo i could find on my computer of the original deck. it looks alright here, but it was in pretty nasty shape... and the garage roof was leaking in about 20 places so it had to come off.


After all the rotting black 2x4's were peeled off, and the nasty rotten 4x4's they were sitting on, there was the shitty tar, gravel and fibreboard to deal with. Whoever thought of tar and gravel as a roofing strategy, didnt think ahead to the clean up stage.

I was in a big hurry to get that gravel off the roof... but in hindight, the all gravel roof was kind of a cool look. if the deck doenst turn out, i'll miss the gravel.

here's the frame... turns out all the cross bracing was a little bit of overkill... live and learn. i'd do a lot of things different next time... but i'm not real sure i'll ever want to build a deck again after this.


It took a while, but i did finally get to start putting down deck boards.

You know, i thought i'd get checked out by a lot more good looking women during this project... i guess i could have been more forward whenever girls walked by... and in hindsight, i think i may have been playing too much sarah harmer while i was working...

"look anna. he's hot" (ok. the choice of wording might be wishful thinking)

"no use saying anything melissa... he's listening to sarah harmer, wearing a wife beater and camo pants... he's gay."

"hmmmnn... i guess youre right"

this last photo is where i'm at now... just starting the middle portion of the deck now. it may not exactly look like it, but im thinking its about 60% done in this photo. i'm not sure exactly how im supposed to go about this last part... so im just gonna start laying down deck boards and hope for the best.

i also build a devastatingly kick-ass wood bin out of some of the warped wood and scraps from the deck... so that i could put all the other waste wood from the deck in.

you might be thinking that my choice of descriptives might be a little over the top... but no. its not. at all. it is without-a-doubt, the best wood bin ever made. i'd include a photo, but no photo could do it justice... its sort of like an amusement park, in that you really have to experience it first hand and in person.

In the event that you want to feel like you're here building the deck with me (which would be strange, since noone came out to help except my dad), Sarah Harmer's Around the Corner is currently my favorite deck building song... the deck has also heard a lot of Audioslave, Dwight Yoakham, Waylong Jennings, Pearl Jam, Corb Lund, Cub Country, Ryan Adams, and Jets to Brazil.

Posted by Nickel at 11:59 PM | Permalink | Comments

Last night was the first night of league bowling... The league doenst officially start until next week, but on this, the first night of bowling, the teams are allowed to come out, bowl for free, and get a look at how the team's shapin' up for the up and coming season. Aaron and I used this opportunity to hold try-outs for the open two positions on the team this year. It went well all things considered. We now have 3 positions solidified, with the fourth a toss up between Brett, should he want to return to the lineup, and Grant, should he feel he can make the season-long commitment. As it is too hard on either myself or aaron, we will leave it to them to fight it out for the much covetted position, on perhaps the greatest bowling team in north america.

After we finished up on the lanes, myself, aaron and mainprize were discussing that it would have been nice to get a team photo in commemeration of the start of season 5 of the "Balls of Justice". With no access to a camera, it took some quick thinking to figure out how we were going to get that team photo, but in the end, we did manage to come up with a plan.

Posted by Nickel at 8:28 PM | Permalink | Comments

Bloggin'

I'm not gonna lie to you, I havent done all that well with the bloggin'. I'm not exactly sure how to remedy the situation... I think I will start limiting the size of every post... if i wasnt seven beers to the wind right now, i would really be giving this some honest thought... but i am, and at the moment, i'm writin something... so for now, im going to consider this a small victory, and reward myself with numero 8...

which brings me to the next sub-chapter of this entry...

Holidays

Yup, I'm on 'em. My first holidays of the year... So far, I've been waking up between 9 and 10 every morning (except that one morning i was really hungover)... I then stumble around for about an hour, sometimes lay back down again, listen to the radio... maybe crank up some waylon jennings, and get up... shower. eat. and then its up to the deck... and allow let me to offer this to the masses. if you have a 25x29 foot deck, never let anyone tell you its only a couple days work. it is not. the deck is coming along, but as of tuesday, its far from done.

Myself and Mr. Matiushyk started our holidays together, but he has soured of late... perhaps it was when i slammed the movie theatre door into his achilles tendon last night... perhaps its just that he's stressed out about his garage project... perhaps life has just got him down... or maybe its me (i have noticed a few people distancing themselves from me lately, but i wrote it off to paranoia)... regardless... bowling starts again tomorrow night, and ol' tushy cant stay mad at me during the bowling season... every wednesday night is like christmas.

ive decided to drink a lot more during this, the holiday season... ive become pretty god damn responsible lately, and while i cant really rebel, i can spend the greater part of my holidays partially intoxicated.

Beerfest

Fantastic.

The Love Life

Lonely and Celibate. I'm guessin that the the two girls i once thought i might marry, will probably get married next summer. thats really not gonna make me feel too shit hot unless my situation changes sometime soon.

Jaswal

Well, Jay got himself married and moved out... He wasnt really a clean roomate, and he wasnt much for initiative when it came to housework, but ill be goddamed if i dont miss him.



The wedding was quite the experience... cracker that i am, i was sort of in awe of the sikh wedding. and while i have had my fill of indian food for the next year or so, i still throw on the turban and robe and stroll around the house from time to time.

Transportation



I bought a Land Rover. A 2000 Discovery. I didnt feel like spending anymore money on the ol' Accord, and since of late, I've felt a little souless anyway, i thought i might as well as have the gas guzzlin SUV to go along with the absence of soul. I can use it for work though, so if i do find my soul again, i can still justify the purchase, and the shitty gas mileage.

And Lastly

Check out Fred's blog... I'm quite excited about his new project. My new dream in life is to be a video game consultant on fred's game... I'll wake up really late in the afternoon, sit around eating snacks, and criticize or compliment, as the situation dictates, and help test the game code when necessary. then when the game gets off the ground, he can pay me to write new game content, test the game itself, and/or lead the online support team. naturally i cant reveal the details of the game itself, but believe me when i tell you its going to be goddam fantastic. otherwise, obviously, i wouldnt have endorsed the project, and graced it with my blessing and eventual presence.

Posted by Nickel at 10:33 PM | Permalink | Comments

It has occurred to me that i actually spend more time thinking about what to blog about than I do actually bloggin'. I've had several fantastic ideas come and go, lost somewhere in that void between drunkness or soberness, or morning and night. I had hoped that I would be a little more free and spontaneous when I started this, so in that spirit...

The time-honored house tradition of "yardwork sundays" was extended to include thursday, friday, saturday, and sunday this past week to prep the garage for a new roof and deck (there's a deck on the top of the two car attached garage) . Apparently the roofer miscalculated with his initial estimate... so, naturally, he has now doubled the original price... to try and save a few bucks, i'll be paying some bikers cash to refinish my garage roof, and taking out a line of credit so that i can put a new deck up there and actually pay for all the work... i'm sure theres no way this could end poorly for me...

At least I didnt have to pay Grant, Jaswal (or Sam) for their help...



I have yet to post about any of our fantastic achievements on yardwork sundays... we've gotten drunk raking out the dead grass this spring and caused an accident by waving at passing cars, we cleaned out 50 years of spruce needles from the giant tree in the front yard, built some planters, and have now stripped the tar, gravel and fibreboard off a flat-roofed garage... but many years from now, when reminiscing over the time that Grant and Jaswal lived upstairs, while i definitely wont forget the invaluable assistance they gave me with the yard, who could ever forget the image of three heterosexual men (allegedly) rollerblading together with a weiner dog. Yup, today marks the first (and possibly last) Rollerbladin' Tuesday.

Until a couple of years ago, I was happily unaware of the bad rap rollerblading had acquired. I enjoy rollerblading... its good excercise, and a nice change from jogging. Apparently though, at least according to some of the feedback shouted at me over the past few summers, its no longer considered the most heterosexual of activities... I find this strange, particularly due to its relation to hockey. I thought maybe i was misinformed at first, but several people have confirmed the public opinion for me now. i still rollerblade, im just unfortunately aware what at least a few of the people who see me rollerblading may or may not be thinking when they see me roll by.

This evening past, the dog guilted me into some recreation time, and feeling a little too lazy to go for a run, i figured she could tow me around on the blades... right as i was strappin' on the ol' boots, jaswal comes home and decides he wouldnt mind coming along... so jaswal goes for his blades, and who strolls up but old "Sags" Masson, who unbeknownst to anyone but the gods, had felt the urge to do a little bladin' for some time now himself. And so it was settled... the three of us would rollerblade through mill creek ravine, at a pace set by a small black weiner dog with bad front legs... the gayness of the situation was not lost on us by any means, but secure in our hetreosexuality, we plodded on.

If only we would have all worn speedos

As I have no photo of the event, I can only offer this photo in an attempt to illustrate the joy Rollerbladin' Tuesday has brought us.



Life ain't easy. There's alot of people I know going through some pretty heavy shit these days. People are losing family members, ending relationships, struggling with shitty jobs, and fighting to make ends meet. At the end of the day, we're all left trying to figure out how to make ourselves and the people close to us happy... and not many things are as hard to attain as genuine, prolonged happiness. Personally, I'm pretty fucken miserable and lonley, so i'm the last guy to offer any advice... And quite frankly, there are too many people out there who think they have good advice to offer, but i did actually hear some good advice today... do your best to enjoy the moment your living in, and maybe, just maybe, itll make it a little easier to start looking optimistically to the future, and/or accepting the past.

Well, i'm here to tell you that its pretty tough to worry about all the shitty things in your life while your coasting along behind a weiner dog on a pair of rollerblades...




(for the record, rasta isnt actually a weiner dog, but she looks like one)

Posted by Nickel at 10:59 PM | Permalink | Comments

Amen Brother.

I'll blog about money and happiness and fulfillment a little later. i do have a thing or two to say about that topic, but lets get to the really important stuff first, and thats a really cool band getting the fucken screws at the iTunes Music Store.

Note: I'm viewing the Canadian version of the iTunes Music Store.

I suppose the fact that you can now download Cub Country's latest album, Stay Poor. Stay Happy through the iTunes store is extremely positive, my only complaint is with the album review they chose to use their. I've only listened to the album once from start to finish so far, but its pretty much what i expected, and i like it alot. Anyone who enjoyed the first album, High Uinta High will also more than likely enjoy the new(er) album. Unfortunately, if you use the review currently provided by the iTunes Music Store to help you make the decision, you might not choose to give this album a chance.

I appreciate the criticisms provided by Ronnie D. Lankford Jr. of the All Music Guide. I'll even go so far as to say he makes some valid points. Some valid, yet critical points. Which is fine. But how often do you see the official, non-user album review commit over half the text to the more negative aspects of the album? Pick a band you hate and look them up on Amazon.com or iTunes and try to find a negative initial review.

So a really cool indie band, writing songs that actually have some artistic integrity, and say something and/or tell a story, gets a review that dissuades people from buying the album? Meanwhile, a piece of fucken horseshit band like Nickelback gets a series of album reviews that blows sunshine up their unoriginal collective ass.

So alright, some of the songs on Stay Poor. Stay Happy might seem a little long, and they might start to lose your attention if your not in the right mood, or not a fan of that particular type of song... but where the hell are the overwhelming number of valid criticisms one could provide regarding your more popular mainstream bands.

According the review over at the iTunes Music Store, Chad Kroeger fills that crappy "Photograph" song with "brooding nostalgia, and their most recent album "clinches Nickelback's claim to rock's top ranks".

Sweet jesus whats wrong with people?

I decided to go some through Nickelback lyrics before I wrote anything about them... they remind me of a kid in grade 9 english trying to come up with short lines that rhyme. It doesnt really bother me that people like the band, its that they have the nerve to defend the bands shortcomings... because compared to a band with well thought out, intelligent well arranged lyrics, Nickelback lyrics might as well be written by a string bean. And I'm not going to go to the trouble of actually listening to a Nickelback song, but im pretty sure from what i remember from the all too many times i've come across them on the radio, that they tend to steer away from making any songs that stray too far from the sound of any one of their other songs... So if songs over 5 minutes long can start to lose a listener's attention, im thinking so can an album full of songs that all essentially sound the same.

I could trash Nickelback for many many more pages, cause i just dont like them at all. I watched a documentary on them once. I already didnt care for them, but the documentary really intensified my passionate disdain for them. Then they fired Ryan Vikadel, who used to play with Corb Lund, and i hated them some more (although i'm happy i no longer have to split my allegiance, and i can dislike the band in its entirity), and rally, i didnt think that was possible... However, I'm really starting to get away from my point here.

Cub Country's Stay Poor. Stay Happy may not be for everyone, but it pains me to see a relatively unknown band I appreciate and enjoy get such a relatively crappy review, that the iTunes masses will happen upon, and possibly use to make a decision whether or not to buy the album. If anything, shouldnt our multimillionaire pop stars be held to a higher standard than a struggling independent band? It wouldnt be hard for me to put together a slightly more accurate (if a little more critical) review of Nickelback's last album... Ofcourse, I might have to listen to it, for which i would require some sort of payment.

As I attempt to conclude this blog entry, I'm not sure where I was initially going with this, or where I ended up? At the end of the day, perhaps I just wanted to document my feelings about Nickelback?

Let me summarize by saying that I like Cub Country... I wish more people would listen to them. I dont like Nickelback. I wish a lot less people would listen to them.

Stay Poor. Stay Happy is really good. I highly recommend downloading If We Should Fall, or Be Your Own Hitman, or at least listening to the tracks they offer for free on their website... And if you like what you hear, perhaps you can wonder over to the old iTunes Music Store and write a review.

Posted by Nickel at 9:44 PM | Permalink | Comments

So I figured it was time to healthy up for a few days here... we've got a few days off before the oilers start up their drive for the cup again, and ive got to do something to make my organs happy... (yes liver, i did recieve your memo)

i like to think that i'm the sort of fellow who'll throw back a few beers when he feels like throwing a back a few beers. And... I like to think its all on the up and up. I'm a pretty peaceful and fun-lovin drinker, so at the end of the day, everbody wins if you ask me. But, I guess every once in a while, you have to step back and examine your life in a more sober, contemplative state. And quite frankly, things could be a lot better. I feel like hell these days, and the combination of the beard, unkempt hair, and monstrous beer gut arent exactly teaming up for an impressive aesthetic presentation... seperately, each of them is a thing of beauty... that goes without saying... but together, i guess its just too much to take in all at once.

waking up to a daily anxiety attack is getting old fast too. the only think i want creeping into my brain at 5am is how glorious my 7am bowel movement is going to be.

but i digress...

against my own wishes, ive decided to set some goals for myself. i'm not going to write these goals down this evening, cause its boring me just thinking about all this, for some reason, i just thought i should document this crossroads. Then, when im laying on my back on the floor two sundays from now, fatter, shaggier and ridiculously hungover, i can read this, and say "shit, i remember that night... i sure had some good intentions."

and, 10 years from now, when im still single and alone... right before i start an evening of applying the dewey decimal system to my vast collection of internet porn, i can read this and think, "dammit, if i only would have followed through...".

who am i kidding... a collection of internet porn big enough to require library like shelving and the dewey decimal system would be fucken awesome. it looks like my list of goals for the summer just got one item longer.

Posted by Nickel at 10:15 PM | Permalink | Comments